Recovering & Transforming

“Life is hard enough without me being horrifically mean to myself.

-Brennah D’Layn, 2025 

Hi, I’m Brennah—and I’m recovering from self-hatred.

Yep. That’s a thing.

It’s been a huge part of my story. A quiet, corrosive force that held me back from sharing, creating, connecting, and believing in myself.

And still—I’ve done some really cool sh*t.

Even while hating myself, I managed to:

• Earn two Associate degrees and a Bachelor of Arts

• Travel abroad six times

• Start and grow a business

• Host seven retreats so far

• Fill almost 100 journals and sketchbooks

• Begin to heal, grow, and (best of all)... learn to love myself

The truth is: I’ve held back from public self-expression a LOT.
I thought I had already worked through this, but healing isn’t linear—and there are always deeper levels.

Right now, I’m evolving again.
I’m showing up differently.
I’m learning to be with myself in a new way.
And I think we’re all meant to do that—again and again, in spirals and seasons.

One practice that’s been helping me lately?
Meditation.

I’ve returned to a simple daily practice, starting with five minutes. Some days it grows to 40.

What matters is that I sit with myself—my full self.

There’s so much energy inside of us. And when we sit with it, even briefly, it becomes a guide.
A whisper that says: Here’s the next step.
Not the whole plan. Just the next small, true move.

Feel the feelings.
Gain clarity.
Write it down.
Share.

So often, we look outside for what to do. I know I have.

We wait for signs, feedback, approval, permission—when really, the wisdom is already within.

But the world we live in teaches us otherwise.

Capitalism and grind culture tell us we’re never enough.
That we have to be productive and perfect to earn rest, respect, or safety.
That we must go faster. Work harder. Prove more. Hoard more.

But I believe the world would NOT fall apart if we slowed down.
In fact, it might become more human. More tender. More alive.

Just like what we saw during lockdown—when everything paused, nature came back in. The world softened.

When I sit with myself, I can bear so much more than I thought I could.
And in doing so, I cultivate self-love. Not through effort or achievement—but through presence.

Just. Being. With. Myself.

I know seated meditation isn’t for everyone. For some nervous systems, it’s not safe. But for me, it’s been a lifeline.

So this is my invitation this week:
Sit with yourself.
Start small.
Let it grow.
Notice what emerges.

In this season of my life, I’m learning to express myself more fully—without apology.
Not to be liked by everyone.
But so I can like myself.

And I wish that for you too.

That you like yourself.
That you feel at home in your skin.
That you move with kindness, not perfection.

Until next time,
🌸 Brennah D’Layn

To follow along the journey and receive weekly notes, join the E-tribe by entering your name and email here or at the bottom of this page.